Changes

Hi friends! Notice anything different? I went ahead and made the changes I discussed in my previous post. Unfortunately, because I changed my URL all of bloglovin' followers are gone :(. It's fine though, hopefully after reading this post most of you will click that little button down below and I'll be back to where I was in no time!

I'm excited about the changes! It feels like a clean slate. My biggest challenge will be consistency and confidence. I know I'll get there eventually.

As far as updates go, I've started physical therapy again! I've been going twice a week for a few weeks now and I'm loving it so far! Don't get me wrong, it's hard and painful but I know it has to be like this before I start seeing results. I'm hoping to get in some aqua therapy classes too! It's all so exciting! For the first time in a long time it feels like things are moving in the right direction.

If you follow me on social media then you know that my Dad has cancer. Since his diagnosis we've had our ups and downs with his care but he's finally in an amazing facility and getting the care he needs. I have so much going on with my own care but somehow I've managed to care for him as well as myself, thanks to the support of family. Dad and I got so lucky. :)

I have been very busy with all of our appointments lately but I still manage to spend time with family and friends when I can. My cousin is getting married in a couple weeks and I'm so looking forward to the wedding and seeing all of my family from near and far again. Sooner than that I'll be going to Passover dinner at my Aunt's house this weekend. Some of my fondest childhood memories are playing "hide the matzo" with my siblings at my Aunt's house.

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I'm so happy to be in a place where I feel like change can be good. The fear and pain will always be there but I'm choosing not to let it control me anymore. I deserve so much better than that.

Thank you so much for reading this and I truly hope you choose to stick around. :)

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Retail Therapy

After a bit of a break, I decided to come on to tell you that I was feeling inspired! It's been a while where I felt like I had something fun or interesting to share on the blog and today it just came to me. Not when I was trying to fall asleep (don't you hate that!), but when I could actually get on and share with you right away! :)

 

I've been feeling pretty overwhelmed lately. It's mentally and physically exhausting. I know things will get better and my life will feel like it's on track once again but right now, things kinda suck. So when I'm feeling a million different emotions all at once, I go shopping!

 

My Mom loves to shop. She used to take my sister and I shopping whenever we were feeling down. It's also a way for her and I to bond. My parents divorced when I was 7 and although all 3 of my siblings moved with my Mom, Daddy's Girl stayed with her Dad. So weekends and vacations were spent with my Mom shopping and doing girly things. Hence my love for shopping!

 

I have also lost 37 pounds in 6 months and nothing fits! Don't you love those excuses ;).

 

Here are some things that I've picked up lately that I'm loving:

Forever 21+

This sweater feeds my love for Americana.
 It's super comfy too. :)

Love this outfit! I have the jeans in black too.

I also picked up some cute scarves and earrings for next to nothing! I was very pleased with my bargain hunting skills at this store. :)

 

Old Navy

 

I love ON jeans
(even better when they're on sale!)

Victoria's Secret



Love Spell Hand and
Body Cream

Pure Seduction Mist

Love Spell Mist



These scents are oldies but goodies and I love how quick and easy body spray is. I already have a travel size container to take these on the go. :)

 

My Mom is in town and plans on coming over later to help me clear some clutter and down size my closet. Spring cleaning in full swing! I am going to try to make a habit of donating more clothes as my style (and size) evolves and I start adding new pieces.

 

I hope you have great day!

Retail Therapy

To go along with my post on Wednesday about therapy, I thought I'd let you in on some much needed retail therapy that I got done on Tuesday. :)

I am a strong believer in retail therapy. My Mom has always told me when I'm sad to get out of the house and do some shopping! It may not solve all my problems but it sure does give me some sort of happiness and I'll take all the happiness I can get! :)

Because of my injury, I can't do much outside. It hurts to walk or sit for too long and I tend to get a bit anxious as well. On Tuesday, I decided to go out of my comfort zone and head over to Target on my own. This is a big deal because I usually have my husband or my mother-in-law with me whenever I need to run errands. I parked in my handicap spot and grabbed an electric cart and was on my way. The clothing aisles at Target are a bit hard to navigate with the cart and I did get a bit anxious at first, but once I found some cute pieces and headed to the fitting room I felt much better.

I wasn't that interested in anything but what was on the clearance racks. I felt like if I could find a good deal, then this trip would be that much more worth it! After a few racks and a bit frustration from bumping into things with my cart I found two lonesome pairs of pants that happened to be in my size! I was so excited!

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The best part of this find was that they were both marked down to $8.38! I even got the red pair for $7.50 because it didn't have the belt! These ankle pants are really stretchy and perfect for date night with my husband or even great for work once I go back. 

After my great discovery in the clothing section, I headed over to the stationary aisle and picked up the prettiest journal. It has everything I needed in it and was only $2.99! 

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I have a love for cherry blossoms and knew this was the one when I found it. If my journal writing goes as well as I hope it does, I plan on picking up more of these and stock up!

This shopping trip was so needed and I'm so pleased with what I got. I'd like to shop on my own more often but it all depends on my pain levels for the day or even week. For now I'll appreciate these little moments I have and continue moving forward. :)

I hope you have a great weekend!

My Journal

Through this journey I've been on with my injury, I've met some amazing people that are working to get me better and reach my goal of fully recovering. One of those people is my therapist, Estrid. I've been seeing her for a year now and I am so happy at the progress I've made. Suffering from chronic pain comes with many down sides. I'd say one of the biggest ones is depression. I never thought I was a depressed person. I was in denial for a very long time about my emotions. I never addressed how I was feeling usually. I got so good at just pushing things deep down and hiding them away that when I was given the diagnoses of severe depression, I couldn't believe it.

Now that I've accepted it, Estrid has been working with me to establish coping mechanisms to help me deal with the hard stuff. One of the issues I face with my depression is feeling lonely and unsupported. Don't get me wrong, my husband and my family are amazingly supportive. Unfortunately, there is only so much they can do for me. These feelings of loneliness and sadness often surface the most at night when my pain may be more prominent and I wake up at 3AM. Rocky, my pup, is even sleeping that late and doesn't want to be bothered (he's an amazing dog and gives me so much comfort) :).

So with all that said, Estrid and I began talking about things that make me feel less lonely at those really tough times. One thing I mentioned to her is prayer. I've never considered myself a very religious person. My Dad is Jewish and my Mom was raised Christian and I got kind of stuck in between. We celebrated Passover in the spring and Christmas in the winter and it worked for our family. As an adult I can see why it can be confusing but as a child I loved all the times I got to spend with family. It wasn't about religion for me. One thing that has stayed constant is my belief in God. That has never wavered and I feel like I could not get through this trying time in my life without Him. Whenever I pray, especially on those really rough nights, I feel so much better. God is not too busy for me, He is always listening and always there. From there, she recommended that I keep a prayer journal.

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I've written in a journal in the past but never for therapy, never for prayer. This is something new to me and I am so excited to see the benefits that will come from this. There have been studies done that show that writing has an improved affect on ones well being. I hope this is what gets me through those hard times and I know I will continue it even once I'm passed all this. I know I am going to get through this and I know that God will be there for me every step of the way.

Do you keep a journal? Has it helped you get through a hard time in your life? I'd love to hear from you! :)