My Journal

Through this journey I've been on with my injury, I've met some amazing people that are working to get me better and reach my goal of fully recovering. One of those people is my therapist, Estrid. I've been seeing her for a year now and I am so happy at the progress I've made. Suffering from chronic pain comes with many down sides. I'd say one of the biggest ones is depression. I never thought I was a depressed person. I was in denial for a very long time about my emotions. I never addressed how I was feeling usually. I got so good at just pushing things deep down and hiding them away that when I was given the diagnoses of severe depression, I couldn't believe it.

Now that I've accepted it, Estrid has been working with me to establish coping mechanisms to help me deal with the hard stuff. One of the issues I face with my depression is feeling lonely and unsupported. Don't get me wrong, my husband and my family are amazingly supportive. Unfortunately, there is only so much they can do for me. These feelings of loneliness and sadness often surface the most at night when my pain may be more prominent and I wake up at 3AM. Rocky, my pup, is even sleeping that late and doesn't want to be bothered (he's an amazing dog and gives me so much comfort) :).

So with all that said, Estrid and I began talking about things that make me feel less lonely at those really tough times. One thing I mentioned to her is prayer. I've never considered myself a very religious person. My Dad is Jewish and my Mom was raised Christian and I got kind of stuck in between. We celebrated Passover in the spring and Christmas in the winter and it worked for our family. As an adult I can see why it can be confusing but as a child I loved all the times I got to spend with family. It wasn't about religion for me. One thing that has stayed constant is my belief in God. That has never wavered and I feel like I could not get through this trying time in my life without Him. Whenever I pray, especially on those really rough nights, I feel so much better. God is not too busy for me, He is always listening and always there. From there, she recommended that I keep a prayer journal.

Source

I've written in a journal in the past but never for therapy, never for prayer. This is something new to me and I am so excited to see the benefits that will come from this. There have been studies done that show that writing has an improved affect on ones well being. I hope this is what gets me through those hard times and I know I will continue it even once I'm passed all this. I know I am going to get through this and I know that God will be there for me every step of the way.

Do you keep a journal? Has it helped you get through a hard time in your life? I'd love to hear from you! :)